Summer Of Single

So, it's a summer of single, officially.

Here are the rules

1. Until your friend sleeps with a guy he is fair game.

2. You never ditch a fellow SOS'er for a dude...EVER.

3. You can only repeatedly see a man if he has equally or more attracitve friends

4. Use protection

There are rules....lets party...BITCHES!

xo
h

Freedom

There is something to be said for personal freedom..not being tied to someone. Making all of my own decisions, all of my own plans..
upcoming warm weekends full of friends, fun, DRINKS and new guys to meet. I can obviously find joy in these things..however...care button? still off...burried. I will not allow feelings to seep to the surface of me. I will not love and I will not let anyone in.
The walls are up and being reinforced with steel as we speak.

the good side?

I can sit in my underwear, in bed, feeling the cool breeze watching tv all day..texting, and noone CARES!

xoxo

ms h

a twinge of pain

So I ran into a friend of..wow I dont know what to call him....X2..there's the EX which is the ex husband..and now X2..formerly known as SM

ran into said friend said hello...told him X2 and I had broken up..his resonse..

"i didnt know that I am sorry to hear.. I never really knew his status anyways.. he is a good friend but I didnt get much into his personal life. That sucks and I wish you both the very best.. Last I heard he was really into you."

Read the last line again...I felt it like a dagger twisting into my heart, the only thing I've felt in weeks...and all I could do was think...yeah, I thought so to.

I've diagnosed myself

as emotionally unavailable. I know that sounds wretched..but for where I am at in life..I think it is how I need to be. The only people in my life getting any feelings from me are my precious kids. Beyond them, I am DONE with feeling for a good, long time.

I have simply shut that side of me off. A failed marriage, followed immediately by a failed relationship...yuck.throw me overboad!!!

I just want to be single, free, and JUST Heather-for as long as it takes to dare open that box called emotions, that I stashed up on my top shelf, where I have to get a ladder to reach it

xo

h

TEQUILA!!!!

WAY to much Tequila. 5 people...1 gallon..yikes. It was mayhem but it was just what the Dr ordered!
Moment of the night..7 naked kids jumping on the trampoline and all of us "responsible" parents laughing hysterically.

Being lazy and cuddling with your friends all morning, while sipping coffee....PRICELESS.

Broken

Broken is loving someone who lies to you and doesn't care.
Broken is lovng someone who wants everyone to know everything, so he can prove, it's all your fault.
Broken is loving someone who STILL never left his girlfriend, no matter how many times he promised.
Broken is loving someone who critiques everything that you do.
Broken is loving who does not respect who you are or how you do things.
Broken is loving someone who tries to shape you into what they want, instead of loving you for who you are.
Broken is realizing how long I allowed you to make me feel this way-and how I continued to take the blame for it.
THAT is broken.

maybe breaking up with you is my first step towards being fixed?

xo
h

Single again

I'm not going to get into the details..however, I have decided it is best to move on in my life without SM. Cold turkey, completely cut the cord..and one foot in front of the other.

I'm going to focus on my job, my kids, and enjoying the blessed life I do have.
for today....I just got off of work and I'm sleeping!!!

the only constant things in life are CHOICE and CHANGE!

xoxo

h